Unfortunately it looks like winter is gone. This is a pic I snapped on my way to work one morning. The thing that i love the most about the cold weather is the trees. Trees with no leaves seem to have so much character… The contrast gives them personality. There’s nothing more peaceful to me than the silence you can hear on a winter day. Of course it helps that everything that could possibly make me sneeze has shriveled up and died..
Apr
23
So long, Winter.
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Apr
20
I mean ok.. I get it. I need to lose weight… i need to exercise.
That’s all loverly.
But Jamaica is 8 weeks away… and well… yeah there’s only so much that can be done between now and then. So i’ve been looking and there is NOTHING catching my eye. Usually I can at least find something tolerable… no such luck.
Sheesh.
Apr
19
I’ve been trying to start this blog for hours but… I just don’t know what to say.
Today I was official granted an absolute divorce i.e. my marriage is over. The hearing itself was pretty uneventful. No outbursts, more laffing than I would have expected. It was just an ordinary day at the courthouse. The whole thing took 13 minutes tops… and then we went to IHOP. We laffed some more, talked about our families… and then we went our separate ways… and i didn’t cry. I didn’t feel the emptiness i expected. I just felt at peace.
The 4 years that I spent with him taught me a TON about myself. I always thought that my ultimate goal in life was to be my mother. I’ve since realized that I don’t have to be exactly like her to still be the wonderful type of person she is. I learned that if I’m not happy, things just can’t go smoothly…
At 31 I can honestly say that i’ve probably spent 29 yrs trying to make others happy.
That’s just not gonna work. It’s one thing to want to do nice things for ppl but it’s another thing to totally lose yourself in the process. I was LOST, dude. I was fortunate enough to have friends that pushed me to find myself. When everything is over I sent a text message to a good friend… someone who has always been incredibly encouraging and who has pushed me to be the best person i can be from the moment i first met him. I think the most important words i heard today came from him. He said, “I’m happy that you see HOW damn much you’ve grown in the last couple of years. Now a new time begins… The bay is right around the corner… Life is about to get exciting!”
When i think about it he saw me at my lowest point. I spoke to him the day I realized that my marriage was over. He gave me strength to move forward and to be strong enough to realize that I was strong. Words cannot express my gratitude… seriously.
In 2yrs i’ve gone from probably the lowest point to what might my highest point so far. I’m surprised when I look in the mirror half the time. I’m happy to be where I am and I’m happy to have ppl close to me that love and care about me and I will continue to improve myself for them, but most importantly, for myself.
Apr
16
There been times that I thought I wouldn’t last for long
Now think I’m able to carry on
It’s been a long, along time coming but I know
A change gon’ come, oh yes it will…
There is a whirlwind of activity surrounding me right now… passports, court appearances, car maintenance… So much is going on. Between the trips and the divorce, I’m honestly a bit off kilter. I’m stuck between being extra needy to being weepy to being ecstatic to just *being*
My emotions have risen and fallen so much in the last few weeks and I’ve done my best to keep it all inside. Not because I think it’s best, but just because everyone is so busy and quite frankly i don’t know what to say. I’m so excited about the future and yet, I’m scared to death. For the first time I feel like I’m controlling my life. It feels extremely liberating and yet, it gets lonely. That’s not to say that I don’t have people there for me, it’s just that sometimes it’d be nice to sit back and ride in the passenger seat for awhile.
Apr
14
That’s the cover of the Administrative Law Review. According to Wikipedia:
The Administrative Law Review (cited to as Admin. L. Rev.) is a law journal officially published by the American Bar Association Section of Administrative Law & Regulatory Practice and American University Washington College of Law. The ALR, which is published quarterly, contains articles, essays, and book reviews by professional legal scholars and practitioners, as well as student-written notes and comments.
Recognized in the legal community as holding title to one of the highest circulation rates of any student-edited journal, the ALR maintains a readership consisting of both private subscriptions and many of the 17,000 members of the American Bar Association Section of Administrative Law & Regulatory Practice.
The ALR is also one of four journals edited by law students at The American University Washington College of Law.
I was selected to be on the staff of this journal. That means that i will be editing and possibly writing for this publication. I’m beyond excited about this. I mean i don’t think that i’m going to have a ton of fun editing and writing, but this is a huge deal for me.
I also spent a HUGE part of the day buying things for the trip. Specifically stuff for this monster of a cat. A new carrier, a collar, a name tag, harness, leash… I think i got everything… and of course i overspent. Interestingly enough, this 21 pound cat is too big for any of the cat products. Everything i bought today is for a medium sized dog. I guess he needs to be in the gym with me.
Gangsta Mittens 